Music to Hover Your Junk Over

So music has been very very good to us in 2007, but it's been a bumpy ride the last several weeks. Bjork's album disappointed, then Wilco's basically did too (Geoff, where's your freakin' review already?!) and last week we learned that the already rescheduled Innocence Mission show at Southpaw had been cancelled.

Then along comes The National.

Boxer is yet another album that is making our ears happy to be alive. We downloaded the first track, Fake Empire, from Idolator quite awhile ago and after a few listens realized that the album proper was worthy of a release-date purchase.

And, as you can see by the fact that we've affixed an album sticker to our bike, it was worth it. Yet another album that we see finishing in our top 5 this year, although how we'll fit a dozen albums in the top 5 remains a mystery.

Boxer is very much about becoming an adult, sacrificing your social life for the pursuit of the almighty dollar. Mistaken for Strangers, the second track, sums up the message of much of the album pretty well, although it's a bit rockier than some of the better tracks: "Showered and blue-blazered, fill yourself with quarters/you get mistaken for strangers by your own friends/when you pass them at night under the silvery, silvery Citibank lights".

Green Gloves, Jen's favorite, builds on the leaving your old friends behind theme with the opening stanza, "Falling out of touch with all my/friends are somewhere getting wasted/hope they're staying glued together/I have arms for them", while Squalor Victoria ("I'm a professional in my beloved white shirt") and RIB's favorite track, Start a War ("I'll get money, I'll get funny again/walk away now/and you're gonna start a war") further develop the album's financial issues.

But since we don't want this whole blog entry to be about regurgitating lyrics, we'll leave it at that. Suffice it to say the songs, besides being smart - and relevant to our age group here at RIB - are gorgeous, haunting and definitely worth prime sticker real estate. Released: May 22. MONEY

Tori Amos' American Doll Posse: Breaking Down Which Tracks are Worthwhile - and Which are Worthless

As you read here a week or so ago, Tori Amos has released her best album in years. True, that's not saying much, but we have to give credit where credit is due: If you are a lapsed Toriphile, American Doll Posse should get you back on track. I never expected to own another one of her albums, or post gushingly about her again, but here I am.

Still, it's 23 tracks long. By RIB's count, that's at least nine too many. So while we certainly recommend that you pick it up, we figured we'd provide this handy breakdown of what's worth keeping and what you're better off trashing -- and a few we haven't decided on yet (note that we've left out references to the album's various "characters" and which songs "they" sing, because, frankly, it's a ridiculous conceit that only contributes to the album's unwieldiness):

1. Yo George. This is a not-very-subtle dig at George W. Bush which asks the pertinent, but heavy-handed, questions: "Where have we gone wrong, America?" and "Is this just the madness of King George?". I'm keeping it for now, because it's pretty, but it might not last. Better as a decent b-side than an uninspiring album opener. STATUS PENDING.

2. Big Wheel. Great, great song. Upbeat, a bit country but not too much, and about 2/3 of the way in, Tori declares, "I'm an M-I-L-F, don't you forget." KEEP.

3. Bouncing Off Clouds. Like a Kate Bush song Kate Bush never recorded, in a Running Up That Hill vein. Fantastic. KEEP.

4. Teenage Hustling. This has had us singing "I'm at your door, I'm at your door, I'm at your do-o-or" repeatedly in our shower, which opens us up for a lot of snarky criticisms, but we're very confortable with both our musical taste and our sexuality. KEEP.

5. Digital Ghost. This is the first track where the annoying side of Tori starts to come out. It seems to be packed with lame technology double entendres, including "I am not immune to your net". But I don't hate it enough to trash it yet. STATUS PENDING.

6. You Can Bring Your Dog. In which Tori compares herself and others to pets, with a boring roadhouse rock band backbeat. DELETE.

7. Mr. Bad Man. Starts off like it's going to be a Herman's Hermits greatest hit. But "Mrs. Brown You've Got a Lovely Daughter" is a lyrical masterpiece compared to lines like "The bad man made her cry". DELETE.

8. Fat Slut. All I can say is thank God it's only 41 seconds long. DELETE.

9. Girl Disappearing. Okay, we're back on track here. The lyrics are pretty blah, but the piano and the music are worth the ride. KEEP.

10. Secret Spell. Reminds me of solo Stevie Nicks. But better. Will I wake up in a cold sweat one night, needing to hear Secret Spell and nothing else? No. But I like it. KEEP.

11. Devils and Gods. Another short one, clocking in at 53 seconds. Not long enough to be much of anything, but at least it doesn't suck like Fat Slut. Would have been better as a little hidden bit at the end of another track. KEEP.

12. Body and Soul. The song starts and I think to myself, "I don't really like most of the Y Can't Tori Read throwback stuff." Then the chorus kicks in and I'm singing along. Could see this as a single, although there are better choices. KEEP.

13. Father's Son. Could be a track from Boys For Pele. And since that is by far her best album, IMO, that is saying a lot. KEEP.

14. Programmable Soda. This song is total nonsense, but so was Mister Zebra. It's not as good, but, like Zebra, this is fun. And at 1:25, it doesn't have quite enough time to wear out its welcome. KEEP.

15. Code Red. I'm sorry Tori, but THIS IS THE FIFTEENTH TRACK. I am already not in the mood for you anymore. I don't even care if this is a good song or not at this point. But since I've undertaken the task of listening to the whole thing, I will have to be fair to Code Red. Which is really not that great of a song. DELETE.

16. Roosterspur Bridge. Zzzzzzz. DELETE.

17. Beauty of Speed. Okay, you've won me back with the opening drum/piano stuff...yes...yes, the spirit of Kate Bush rejoins us on track 17. Good stuff. KEEP.

18. Almost Rosey. Poor lyrics, lackluster performance. More dull than anything else. DELETE

19. Velvet Revolution. As a former resident of Prague, I was hoping for something else. I guess "something more" would be appropriate too. DELETE.

20. Dark Side of the Sun. Tori's version of Blowin' in the Wind-meets-Big Yellow Taxi, anyone? Not good. DELETE.

21. Posse Bonus. As this is track No. 21, don't you think we've had enough Posse bonuses? I could have stomached this better earlier in this sitting. On second though, nah. DELETE.

22. Smokey Joe. Can't quite make heads or tails of this song yet, which appears to be about revenge. But it seems to work and I will return to it. KEEP.

23. Dragon. Nice, dark keyboard and piano. The lovely chorus is "stay awhile, stay awhile, stay a-whi-le" - but how much better would that sound if this was track 11? KEEP.

CONCLUSION: Tori Amos needs an editor. American Doll Posse would have been perfect at about 11 or 12 tracks. As is, there's a whole lot of crap to float through to get to the chewy cookie center. Worth it though - especially now that we've got it all sorted out.

Bjork's Dull Flame

I've been holding off on this post for a couple weeks, because I didn't want to have to type what I am now going to type:

The new Bjork album just isn't that good.

Volta isn't terrible, mind you. I like Innocence when it's not giving me a headache, the Antony duets are strong enough and I See Who You Are is a mostly good example of the recent spate of songs about lovers dying and, presumably, burying eachother (see Iron & Wine's Naked as We Came or Wilco's new On and On and On or, well, pick any Decemberists song). But the latter, like many songs on this album, never takes off. Where are the hooks?

I am so not a "where are the hooks?" kind of guy, but when you make an album with Timbaland that has several songs based on very hard beats - Declare Independence is Industrial Rock, for Chrissake - you expect to want to maybe, at least once, if only for a minute, get out of your seat and dance. Or maybe even just bop your head.

But Bjork isn't having it.

I guess maybe I tapped my toes once or twice for Earth Intruders, but the production - I can't believe I'm saying this about a Bjork album - is kind of murky and the beats don't get the chance to beat your brains around a bit. Even her quirky English issues - I think she means Earth Intruders as some kind of return-to-the-soil revolutionary guerilla force, not space aliens - annoys me here. And why does it end with a minute-and-a-half of foghorns?

My favorite track on the album is The Dull Flame of Desire - Bjork and Antony have two of my favorite voices in the world - but I'm still trying to understand why the song had to last seven-and-a-half minutes when there are only 10 lines to the lyric. Like Declare Independence, it starts off with such great promise, then just plods along, with peaks that just aren't majestic enough. In the case of Dull Flame, the high points are the highest on Volta, but if I'm within reach of my mouse, there's little chance I'm making it all the way through.

I do love the high school band horns on this album, and I hold out hope that Bjork will sneak up on me with this one. But I expected it to put her earlier albums to sleep for awhile and, instead, it's only making me appreciate them more. Released: May 8. UNNECESSARY VOODOO.

Feist on a Bus

Hat tip to The Yellow Stereo.

Records I Buy (Catch-Up Edition)

There are numerous reasons why I haven't posted in ages - from the usual (laziness) to the unusual (click here for details) to the hopefully never again (oral surgery, followed by a week of walking death after a terrible reaction to the anasthesia) - but I've also been busy picking up and listening to a lot of new albums. So before the new Bjork comes out and throws some of these on the backburner, I figured it was time to give them some quality blog time.

Shearwater - Palo Santo (Expanded Edition)

Shearwater's Palo Santo finished second in last year's Album of the Year countdown, and it would likely have won had it not been for the fact that I HATED the production. When it was soft, it'd be too soft, so you'd blast the volume and the loud parts would rip your ears off. And although the album has a dark, murky feel to it, the production was just a bit too, well, dark and murky.

Apparently Shearwater felt the same way, because, after signing a new deal with Matador records, they've re-released the album, with five tracks completely recorded, the rest remixed, new packaging and a bonus disc with new tracks and demos.

And...

It.

Is.

Awesome.

Just about every problem I had with the original version has been fixed and the songs have improved from muted, almost-epics, to clear, ringing full-fledged epics. The old "Hail, Mary" was one of my favorite songs - it rocked, but also seemed a bit held-back. This one soars, ending with a lengthened, now-breathtaking jam session that really pops. The new opening drumbeat of "Red Sea, Black Sea" is a call to arms and the banjo is luscious.

Shearwater's new-and-improved Palo Santo owns the original, and the bonus tracks are great, too. If you didn't pick this one up last year, now's the time. Released: April 10. ESSENTIAL

Shearwater - Red Sea, Black Sea (New Version) [mp3 via Pitchfork]



Andrew Bird - Armchair Apocrypha

So with the new-and-improved Shearwater and Neon Bible burning a hole in my iPod, you'd think Andrew Bird would get short shrift. Not so. Despite those two albums, I keep going back, time and time again, to Armchair Apocrypha.

This is going to be one of my favorites when 2007 is all said and done.

It doesn't quite catch you on first listen, but several of these songs - Fiery Crash, Plasticities, Heretics and Simple X, for example - are already old friends. Days have passed where I sang nothing in my head but "Thank God it's fatal, thank God it's fatal..." over and over again.

And his whistling! This one's a real gem. Released: March 20. PRECIOUS TERRITORY





Feist - The Reminder

Okay, the rest of the albums on this list have been getting short shrift, to various degrees and for various reasons.

Feist is an undeserving victim of the Shearwater-Arcade Fire-Andrew Bird triumvirate, as her new album seems great. "My Moon, My Man" has been known to poke "Heretics" out of my head at times, although my version goes "My moon, my man, my bah-doo-be-doo-doo", which tells you a lot about how many times I've listened to this one so far. But it will get the attention it deserves soon enough. Released: May 1. BAH-DOO-BE-DOO-DOO






Tori Amos - American Doll Posse

A lot of the songs are total crap and will be deleted very soon. But the good ones are really good. Who would have thought?

I lost interest in Tori a long time ago (she peaked with Boys for Pele, and everything since has been a let down), but songs like "Big Wheel", a country rock number in which Tori declares herself a MILF, and Teenage Hustling, featuring an irresistable "I'm at your door, I'm at your door" refrain, are the best Tori songs I've heard since my days as a Toriphile. These two alone are worth it; the others have yet to get final judgement. Some seem like they could be keepers ("Father's Son" is on now and I'm digging it), but a lot of the time I find my cursor hovering over 'send to trash'... Released: May 1. MILF



Bright Eyes - Cassadaga

One that is being ignored as well, but is most likely to collect dust.

I liked I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning but I was hesitant to buy this because I find him a bit too precious. I got it anyway and regretted it from the first track, which begins with Revolution 9-like orchestral music and a talking woman, and features the cringe-inducing line "get your revolution at a lower price". I do like "Four Winds", though, and it's always great to hear Gillian Welch (she sings backing vocals on "Classic Cars") so maybe I'll buy into this one down the road. Maybe. Released: April 10. I'M FALLING ASLEEP, IT'S EVENING



Various Artists - A Tribute to Joni Mitchell

Was thinking about buying it, then found it in the free bin at work. What a steal.

Unfortunately, it's not really that great. The Sufjan and Bjork offerings are good - you knew I'd say that, but they really are, especially Sufjan's mad-genius version of "A Free Man in Paris" - but Prince sounds like a parody of himself and most of the rest I'll probably never listen to again - why bother when I already have the originals?

And why does the picture of Joni on the cover make it look like she's dead? It's a tribute, not a memorial. Released: April 24. BLUE



The Shins - Wincing the Night Away

*Snore* Released: January 23. SNORE

Five Questions with Jen: Lily Allen - Alright, Still

Excuse me for gushing, but my girlfriend Jen finally bought an album that doesn't make me wretch. Our musical tastes diverge quite a bit, and although she's tolerant of my stuff (and even likes some of it), I have trouble swallowing her music. I'm a snob and she's a top 40 girl.

But a few weeks ago, Jen bought the new Lily Allen - and I really dig it. So I sat down with Jen (okay, we did this via email) and asked her about the album.

1. First off, who the heck is Lily Allen and what is Alright, Still? And is it any good?

Sorry, I still don't know that much about Lily Allen. I could have done some research, and I really meant to, but it felt too much like homework and I am going to have a lot of that to do come September, and I don't plan on starting a minute earlier.

I was introduced to her one Saturday night as I was watching SNL, not something I normally watch but I was up waiting for a certain person (more on that later; see my answer to question No. 3), and I needed a distraction, even a bad one, at the moment. While watching the show I thought I found something new -- me, finally, finding something different and interesting in music!

I could not wait to share that with others, especially the ones that tell me I need to find some new music, but when I went to tell my sister she said that Lily Allen was old news and I was still "behind the times". That did not change my opinion of the album, however. I can relate to many of the songs. I think most people, especially women, but also those in and out of relationships, having to go to clubs to meet people, or still young enough or possibly optimistic enough to find good things in not-so-great situations can relate, too.

2. The album is hip-hop, is it not? Records I Buy doesn't really dig hip-hop but it likes this album. Is it because we're elitist (it's European!) or are we outright racists (she's white!)?

(No answer.)

3. Let's talk about the first track, 'Smile'. Might you have a story about that song? Perhaps about a boyfriend going out drinking and not calling? How was that song helpful?

Smile was the song I saw performed on SNL. It's about a girl whose relationship ends because the guy is a schmuck (aren't they all;) and now she wants to see him hurt. I took it to mean emotionally hurt, unlike the video (which takes on another form of hurting that I could get behind for the right person, or should I say If the right person did something to deserve it). The video is posted below.

Anyway, the song is a great break-up song, or at least a great "revenge" song and at the moment I was watching it, that felt like something I needed to hear ... posssibly because a certain boyfriend stayed out all night long drinking with his buddies and not bothering to call to let his girlfriend know how late he was going to be. Or maybe it was another reason, and perhaps the first one was just an example -- because, as you all know, MY boyfriend would NEVER do something like that. He is way too thoughtful.

4. Do you have another favorite song on the album? What do you like about it?

My other favorite song is Knock 'Em Out. This song is for any person, guy or girl, who has been hit on by someone that they are just not interested in, and that person will not take the hint. I am sure that everyone has had this happen at least once in their lives. I was usually too nice and would get stuck talking to that particular person.

The main character in this song would not have stood for it. She had some great excuses that I may want to keep on file for future use, such as, " Nah I've got go cuz my house is on fire".

5. If you had to sum up your impressions of this album in one illustrative vocabulary word - a la Record I Buy reviews - what would that word be?

I DON'T HAVE A WORD, YOU THINK OF SOMETHING.

All in all, I may not have been the first to discover her, but I am glad that I did. Now I have music that is included on the "2007 playlist".

Hoboken is Flooding

Welcome to Part II of the All Hell Breaks Loose in Hoboken series on this formerly music-themed blog.

The following is a video I just shot of my basement, which is rapidly filling with water. When we got home from the Newport mall this afternoon, water was rushing into it like a waterfall but you could still walk to the washer and dryer. Now it's up to the third step.

No one in my apartment building seems concerned. A guy from the third floor came down this evening with laundry and when I told him he might want to rethink that, he laughed and told me the thought hadn't occured to him that the basement might be flooding. To his credit, he called the building's maintenance number from his cell phone. He was told to "wait until it stops raining."

Great.

I also took a video of my front steps and Madison St., but it's too dark to see. Hoboken is the new Venice.



I have Hoboken411.com's live police scanner streaming through iTunes. About a half hour ago, they announced that all personnel should remain at their posts - meaning a shift change was due. One guy radioed back that he'd stay at his post - but he needed to change his wet pants first. UPDATE: There has now been, according to the scanner, a giant mudslide on Sinatra Drive. Oy vey.

Oh, and Hoboken is still burning, at least somewhere. Fire trucks are making a major racket.

Hoboken is Burning

A break in our regularly scheduled music program for some pictures of Hoboken, flooded and on fire. Jen and I had to wade home from the PATH this afternoon in knee-deep water. No joke. Our basement is flooded, too, and the water's still rising...

These shots are from 2nd and Madison and 2nd and Jefferson, looking at a huge fire still burning at a lumber yard on 2nd and Clinton. We knew there was a fire somewhere because we smelled smoke. Jen went around the corner and saw heavy black smoke filling the air, and came inside to get me.

The floodwater shot at the end is not nearly as impressive as what Jen and I saw during our swim home. Waves were crashing against buildings, cars were nearly submerged and you couldn't even see the sidewalk in places. But I didn't have my camera then, and all we wanted to do was get home and get warm...









For more photos, and to see the above shots in their full-sized glory, click here.

How to Kill a Euro Dance Party

1) Observe many underaged Spanish girls dancing wildly.

2) Decide to be retro (in honor of the recently married groom.)

3) Decide early R.E.M. is a good era to represent.

4) Find out the DJ has no "End of the World as We Know It"

5) Settle for "Losing My Religion (Nuevo Remix)"

6) Wait for said "Nuevo Remix" to come on.

7) Literally watch the lithe, ripe, undulating, underaged Spanish girls stop undulating and go back to their tables as the song you selected starts playing.

8) Sulk.

Alanis' Lovely Lady Lumps

This has been making the rounds for several days but I'm posting it now because 1) Steph emailed me a link to it today and I finally watched it and 2) I am sick of seeing Keith Richards at the top of my blog. And, yes, 3) it's funny. Although I am not sure if Alanis is one to talk, considering some of her past gems.

Keith Richards Did Not Snort His Father

Keith Richards mixed his dead father's ashes with cocaine and inhaled it. Really. I'm not making this up. UPDATE: Now it appears HE was making it up. Not that I totally believe him, but whatever. I'm tired of this story now anyway.

From the original story:

"The strangest thing I've tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father," Richards was quoted as saying by British music magazine NME.

"He was cremated and I couldn't resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn't have cared," he said. "... It went down pretty well, and I'm still alive."

Bjork's Actual Artwork for Volta

Yes, indeed. And no, it's not April 1 anymore.

You can read more about it at Pitchfork. To me, it looks like a soda bottle with feet. Or, even better, like one of these with feet:


But here's where I piss Bjork haters off: I like it. I am not only still psyched about Volta, I am even more stoked about it now. Why? Because, like Bjork says in the Pitchfork interview, the bright colors (and comic elements) are a real contrast to her last several albums (re: every one since Post) and represents a thematic change as well. To me, that's refreshing. A fun, danceable Bjork album sounds just about perfect.